I’ve thought about starting a journal for a while, but I never could find the inspiration; but my sister Kaawenyth told me once that I shouldn’t need inspiration for a journal. Just write what I think and feel. I replied that I’ve never been a big thinker or feeler, and she just laughed and said I was lying to myself. I guess she’s right. I mean, I’ve had the same lover since I was a child, and I’ve read every book in the Library of Elden Root—okay, not every book, but a lot of them. Mum and Da always stressed that it was just as important to be well read as it was to be good with a blade and a bow. I just never thought much about it. I guess I learned and just didn’t realize it. Huh.
A/N: Graphic violence and torture.
Ben didn’t know what day it was; he had lost all track of time. It didn’t really matter, though, because it was looking more and more like they would never go home again. Serana and the others had probably closed the portal by now, figuring he and Rowan were lost. Which, he guessed, they were. There wasn’t much left for them now except for overpowering thirst. At first, he had thought a lot about Serana, missing her, wishing he could hold her again; but as time went by, all he could think about was the dryness in his throat. He hated her a little bit now. She had made him this way, caused his desperate dependence on living blood, a sweet nectar he would likely never taste again. But she had only been trying to make them stronger; he knew that, and as much as he hated her, he loved her even more.
The small glimpse of Coldharbour that Rowan and Ben had gotten through the portal had done little to prepare them for walking into it. It was an assault on the senses from the very beginning, and Rowan realized right away that being a vampire was going to be a great help. It was bitterly cold, more so than the harshest of Skyrim winters. The stench was oppressive, and even though a layer of white snow covered the ground, shadow still dominated over light. Being immune to the cold, not needing to breathe, and having excellent night vision came in very handy. The worst thing, though, was the sound of constant screaming that resonated through the air from all directions. Rowan’s vampiric senses could do nothing to filter that sound out.